Star Gazing

So, tonight was supposed to be a monumental night to watch the stars.  Jupiter and Venus were supposed to cross paths tonight. So, I have been prepping all day for this.  I layed out a blanket in the back yard, and got my drink, and went out to enjoy the evening about 8:40 pm my local time. Well, much to my dismay, there was far too much cloud cover for my hubby and I to get a good look.
But, we didn't let that stop us from enjoying our evening. Instead of looking up at the stars, we looked at the stars in each others eyes, and started talking about some of the changes we are going to be making in our lives over the next little while. We want to be successful, and happy, and healthy.
There are some exciting things coming our way!  We are excited for this adventure! We may not have been able to see what we went outside for tonight, but I feel we got a little closer to each other tonight in what we shared.
All my love,
Shae

Welcome to our home!

Ok, so everyone has been asking for pictures of the house now that we are in it, and have had some time to settle in.  We had our housewarming party this last weekend, and it was wonderful to have our friends and family here to enjoy the house! The kids that came were thoroughly entertained by the water fun in the back yard.

So, here is the grand tour!

 Here is our front door. Eventually we will be painting and replacing it. We feel the window is too big, and there are too many red doors on our street! :)

You walk in, and this is your view.

Off to the left of the front door is a half bath.

On the right, there is a coat closet, then the stairs to the second floor. To the left of the stairs is this little set up, which I am mostly pleased with.  The vintage desk, (which has been in my family many moons,) will be getting a makeover.

Here is our living room!

I am very pleased with the way this room turned out. 

Here is our kitchen.  It is quaint, but it is the perfect size for us right now.

Now, it is time to go upstairs for the rest of the tour!

Off to the left of the staircase is a full bathroom, complete with tub/shower combo.

Outside the bathroom though, we had to geek out a little. The door you see on the left is our spare bedroom right now, which we are currently using as storage, but will hopefully become our nursery. The previous owners painted it this adorable yellow color, and it gives me hope for our future family.

Here is our office, complete with the desk my amazing neighbor built for me!  Thanks again Trevor!

Next on the tour is our loft, which will serve as our library, and in future a play room for the children we hope to bring into this home.

 Last, but not least, we head into the master bedroom.  I didn't take pictures of our master bath. It will be getting a makeover because I want to arrange the closet better, so there are no pictures of that.

Of course, our Kaladin had to get in the pictures and feel involved!  Little guy loves to pose for pictures!

I hope you enjoyed this tour of our home!  There are still some places that need to be decorated, but that comes with time as you are in a home. If you have any questions or suggestions, just leave them in the comments below!

All my love,
Shae

New Adventure Created.... Now What?

So, the initial reason I started this blog was to help other people who had experienced divorce, and to have somewhere to talk about the things that I had been going through during that difficult time in my life.  Yes, I was the one who had the courage to end the relationship, but it wasn't any easier on me.
Since I met my amazing husband, and started this new adventure with him, my blog has really drifted from that. It's been more what we are experiencing as a couple, and the adventure we are on now.  I'm not creating a new one, I am living it.
So, now what?  What is the next step I want to take with this blog, and where do I want it to go? At the point I am at in my life, I don't really experience rear view thinking nearly as much as I used to.  I am looking forward to the continuing adventures that the hubs and I will be having. Our main focus now is finding out what needs to happen for us to start out family. (Outside of the obvious, of course.)
I would love to keep this blog focused on the future for now.  If something crops up from the past, I may need to use this blog as an outlet for that, but for the most part, it will be focused on the future I have with my hubby, and what we are doing with this adventure we call life!
Because of this, I am wanting to change the title of my blog, but I am coming up with NADA!!  I am looking for suggestions!  Please comment with a suggestion for me!  I need to get the ball rolling on this!
All my love,
Shae

Time to make some changes!

Since my last post, I have been doing some research on ways that I should be eating to help with my PCOS. ( For those who are unaware, PCOS is somewhat like diabetes, because it is linked to your insulin levels. That is a very simplified version, but if you want more info, check out WebMD.) In all of my research, it says that eating low carb is the way to go.

I have eaten low carb several times, and I do see results with it.  The diet plan I have had the most success with is Take Shape for Life, (Medifast with coaching.) I lost a significant amount of weight with it, and generally enjoyed it.  After about 40 lbs I stalled out, and started to get bored with the food choices.  I have been considering trying it again, but it is really pricey, and budget is a factor.

In my research, most people have mentioned either eating a Paleo diet, or a Ketogenic Diet. (Paleo is low carb. Ketogenic you don't eat more than 20 grams of carb in a day, so it is far more strict.) As I have been researching the two diets, I think they are doable.  I get to lots of meat, cheese, and veggies that I like. My hubby lost almost 200 lbs on a Ketogenic Diet before we met. Sadly, I derailed him from his efforts, and we are both working on getting healthy again.

Knowing that a Ketogenic Diet has worked well for my hubby has me leaning towards adopting that lifestyle. He would know how to help me get through the plateaus, and he would be doing it with me, so it would be an amazing support. 

Paleo on the other hand would let me have a little more carb, which might feel better in the beginning. I would still be able to cook with Steve, just add something else with mine. 

It can be scary to make these changes, but I know that they need to happen for my future family. I can make changes so that I am able to snuggle little babies and have them look like me and my hubby. It will probably be a few weeks more before I can actually fully start on anything. I will let you know for sure what I decide once I start!

All my love,

Shae

For more info on PCOS, go here: Running With PCOS Her blog is fantastic, and has tons of information.

For more info on Take Shape For Life, go here: TSFL

For more info on Paleo, go here:Beginners Guide to Paleo

For more info on Keto, go here: What is Keto? This is from a fantastic subreddit with tons of info.

The Fear is Real

For those who have known me for a long time, they know a little bit about this.  It isn't something I have talked about a lot on this particular blog,but I feel it is the time in my life where I need to be talking about it again.

I have PCOS.

I was diagnosed within the first year of my first marriage, and that is a scary thing. While I was married to my first husband, I had one early term miscarriage. That's not something most people know, but I feel it is the time to share it. It was after my diagnosis. I had hope that I would still be able to get pregnant, and carry a sweet little baby in my tummy, and have that connection, and be a mommy in the traditional sense of the word.

The rest of my first marriage, there weren't any other miscarriages, and no other indications of pregnancy. I was devastated during my marriage because of it. On top of the other issues we had as a couple, we weren't getting pregnant.

I am grateful now that we didn't have children, because it let both of us get a fresh start in a new life. My sweet hubby and I talked when we were dating, and decided that we would never use birth control,or anything to prevent kids coming into our life, because we are both at a point in our lives where it is something that we want. I still love that he is ready for a family.

We are over 9 months into our marriage now, and nothing has happened. We are both anxious around the time I am supposed to start my period. Any time it goes past when I should start, I am taking a pregnancy test. Every month, we are both sad when it does start.

I am afraid that I will never get to be a mommy in the traditional sense, where I carry the baby in my tummy.  I know I will be a mommy, because my hubby and I have talked about it, and we are both ok with an adoption if we can't conceive on our own. We wouldn't love that child any less. We are just hopeful that we can make it happen on our own first.

I have an appointment set up with a doctor that specializes in PCOS in the next couple of weeks, and I am afraid of bad news. I fear that I haven't taken care of myself in the way that I should have, and that there is no hope left of me being able to do this. I'm turning 30 soon, and I do think that is playing a part in it. Most of my friends are done having children, and I still want my kids to have little friends they can play with!  Maybe that is selfish of me.

Plain and simple, I am scared. I wanted this to happen with no complications. I have this feeling in my gut that I am not going to be so lucky. Any prayers and well wishes are always welcome.

All my love,

Shae

To Vlog, or Not To Vlog...

Alrighty everyone,

Thank you for all of those who have been reading this blog over the last couple of years as I have used it as an outlet to heal, to help others, and to give others hope after going through a divorce. Several people have suggested to me that I should start a youtube channel, or a vlog. I go back and forth about that. Right now, I don't like how I look, and want to drastically change that before I am filming myself for the world to see.  At the same time, I know I am not the only woman out there that looks like this, and that is having the same struggles in life.

I feel that the blog is sufficient for most of my needs. I fear that I am not reaching as wide of an audience base as I would like to, but I am also not doing anything currently to promote this blog other than share it on my Facebook page.

Needless to say, I need some advice in which way I should be taking my story and my future journey.

Steven and I are anxious to start our family, and are somewhat fearful of the road ahead of us. I have a doctors appointment in a couple of weeks to hopefully get some more answers in that regard. I feel that I can help others with sharing my experiences.

My friend Tawny is a light in a dark place. She has Lyme Disease, and started a blog sharing her experiences. I hope that I can do the same thing as her with this blog, or possibly a vlog.

All help is appreciated.

All my love,

Shae

Happy Birthday My Love!

My Dearest Love,

Thank you for inviting me into your world a year and a half ago.  You are such an amazing blessing in my life.  I would hate to think where my life would have gone without you entering it. Thank you for always taking care of me, and looking out for our future kidlets. You are an amazing man, and the most perfect partner I could have ever dreamed to have had. I could gush on and on about you, and I do, very often. For today, I will keep it simple.

I love you, and thank you for choosing me to be your wife.

All my love,

Shae