I NEED TO SLOW DOWN!!!!!!

I have strep throat.

The only time strep throat manifests itself, is when I am putting too much pressure on myself, or overworking myself.  I think lately, I have been doing a bit of both of those.

When it comes to overworking myself, that is my choice.  I really want to do well at my new job.  It is so completely different than what I have done for years, that I feel like I have to come in, guns blazing, and make a good strong impression.  There is this stigma with being a hairdresser, that a lot of people assume you are stupid.  I am not stupid.  I went into hair, because I enjoyed it, and I thought it would be great once I have my own family, to have something where I could completely control the schedule so I am there for my kids.  That being said, I really love this new job, and I want to excel at it.  Being the worrier that I am, I have been afraid of not catching on to things fast enough.  The people I work with, and my boss reassure me that they are pleased, but I still will sometimes come in early, just to feel like I am getting things done soon enough.

I know that I stress, and put a lot of pressure on myself for many reasons.  I want to make sure I am a good daughter, a good employee, that I am self sufficient, that I am a good partner for Steven, and much more.  I know that I am stressing unnecessarily.  Tonight, my friend Carrie reminded me that I need to breathe, and take some time for myself. I have been taking time for myself.  I choose to spend most of that time with Steven, because he makes me happy, and I remain more calm in his presence.  He doesn't put any pressure on me whatsoever.  It's really nice.

I just need to take a chill pill, and relax a bit.  Next weekend I will be in Idaho spending time with family.  I think that will be a good break from everything where I can recharge.  Plus, I can't go back to work until Friday, so tomorrow I'm going to read a book, and relax.