"A grateful person is rich in contentment"

Title quote is by David A. Bednar

Lately,  I have been pondering what it means to be content.

When I looked up the definition of content, it was defined as "in a state of peaceful happiness." That was a bit of an eye opener for me. It's not only being happy, it's being peacefully happy! What a wonderful word!

There have been times in my life where I have been happy, but my life was chaotic at the same time. There have been times where my life was peaceful, but I wasn't happy.

What is the magic formula to be both happy and peaceful?  For me, I have come to learn that is balance. When I keep my chaos to a minimum, leave the unnecessary drama out of my life, and do things and enjoy time with people that are positive and make me happy.   That is when I feel content.

As I have been in this new relationship with Steve, I have found myself very content.  Yes, I still get nervous about things,  and I have worries and hard days, but I still feel content.

This is Steve's definition of contentment

I was on my way there before Steve entered my life I think. I started to realize that even though I love being able to help people, and serve them in the ways they need, I need to take some time for me. I needed to do things that make me happy.  I love to read,  and I am taking the time to read more. I love my job, so I am working a little more now. I love attending the temple, so I am attending more often. Little things like that. It's funny how taking the time to do those little things, makes such a big difference in how I feel in my life.

In my first marriage,  I felt guilty when I would want to read instead of spend time with my ex husband, even though I didn't enjoy what he was doing/watching.  I felt it was my duty to spend time with him, and I started to lose myself.  When I finally started to take some of that time for myself,  my ex would start to get after me and make me feel guilty for taking that time. I didn't know how to be content, and for my ex to be happy at the same time. I think a lot of it is my ex didn't know how happy those small things made me. He just thought I was trying to ignore him, or that I was mad at him.  He didn't understand that I did those things because they made me happy.  They didn't have anything to do with him, or what was going on between us. When I look back at that relationship, it was all about him. I wasn't happy.  There wasn't balance.  When we were in our counseling, I brought some of those things up, and he didn't seem to care that those small things were something I needed.

I have since learned that to be content in or out of a relationship, you need to be able to do things you enjoy, and not feel guilty for it. That's something that is great about Steve. He really understand my interests. We share a lot of things,  and we are starting to share things together that the other had never been exposed to. He doesn't mind that I am a nerdy girl that loves to read! He enjoys books too. Now we are trading book series.

I notice that I am content, because not only does Steve make me happy because he is so fun, he also has taken the time to understand me as a person.  Just today, I had a moment where a friend wanted to spend some time with me this evening at an FHE.(Family Home Evening, in which we spend the evening with friends and family cultivating our relationships with them.)  Since I am doing mine with Steve and his brother tonight instead of with my ward, I invited her along without even consulting him.  I called him after letting him know, and he let me know it was fine, and he loved me for doing it. I'm so lucky and blessed to be his girlfriend.

So contentment comes when you find balance in your life. Seek out the things that make you happy and eliminate the unnecessary drama and worries as much as possible.  That has been my magic formula.  Any other opinions and techniques are welcome!

All my love,
Shae